Skip to main content

Things I wish I had done in My Twenties


Hang on! I've got a few more months to revel the last year of my twenties. I hang on to my 29th year like a kid hanging on to her rag doll in an airport – anxious that it might be snatched away if her attention is lost for even a minute.
I was with a friend today and I was saying how it’s strange that I remember turning 23 or 24 and not having a soul comment on my marital status, and suddenly I cross 25 and everyone acts like I have said that I have an orchard growing in my underarms. (Really, that’s the only way I could describe the horror it).
This had me wondering if I would have been a different person at 30 if I had done some things differently in my 20s. Could I have achieved more? Yes. Would my bank balance have been greater? Perhaps. Would I have been wiser? Maybe not. In what would have been a few seconds I had flashbacks to deciding moment that would have benefitted me today that I hadn't seized – it's no time to regret these decisions, but I can't help but wonder...
I thought I'd list a few things that you could maybe help you if you are still wheedling in your twenties and want to check if you are on the right track.
(1) Toxi-Tales:
If I had one chance to negotiate a point in my life, it would have been not dating Boyfriend 2. To be honest with you, I only dated him because I wasn’t seeing anyone else. I look back now, and all I see is a waste of three prime years in my twenties.
Toxic relationships are common to everyone. It’s like those ugly scabs from vaccinations we have on our shoulders. Useful – but you really don’t know for what purpose. 

(2) Zoo…Zoo…Zumba!:
It’s strange how I had never engaged in any physical activity or exercise until I was 28, and it’s stranger still how I had managed without it. I am happy I found my niche in CrossFit because a ‘lotus' pose is not meant for me; nor do I have the grace to pump, kick, sway during Zumba – I just stop at the ‘kick' because I am out of breath and have the instructor yell, 'Posh, posh, posh' (That's 'push' with an accent and acoustics)




(3) Culinary Credit:
This may be venturing a little beyond a Prima Kottu Mee and eggs as a meal. [Here’s hoping for a husband who cooks]
(4) Sleep, Beautiful Sleep.
When I sleep for more than 8 hours, my colleagues claim that I look exhausted. I rationalize saying that my exhaustion died but left its soul behind.
Whether or not sleep enhances beauty, I don’t know. But, what I do know is that I would have wasted precious time staying awake doing something unproductive (No, Glee, Supernatural, and Modern Family don’t qualify as unproductive) and not getting sufficient amounts of sleep.
I am almost embarrassed to talk about it but I remember staying up talking to guys I liked at the time until 3 AM. What have I got now as memorabilia for these times? Crow’s feet deftly around my eyes!
Binge sleeping is not the same as restful, healing sleep.
(5) Nastay Frans:
Clearly, my twenties lived up to ‘friend for a reason, friend for a season'. It's just as important to guard your hearts against friends as you do from guys. Just yesterday, I was thinking of three ‘seasonals’ who took turns to bid farewell in the most ungracious way in 2013, 2014, and 2015. Lessons well learned. My lesson here is to do my part as a friend, and not worry whether they live up to their end of the deal. This also points back to No. 01 on my list of toxicity.




(6) Dating Dolores:
Why couldn't I have uttered a monosyllabic ‘No' when asked out by some El Crudos? Why did I think that if I declined one I would have had seven years of bad luck? Dates are not chain letters; it’s only in ‘doing’ that you lose. You are left to interpret that verb in whichever way choose.
I think the reason behind agreeing to most dates was because I could not bear to admit that I was undesirable. Oh, if only my nineteen-year-old self could have met me now.

(7) Job Hop:
I wasn’t too attached to the parental units growing up, so, it’s only natural that I never sought their advice in my early twenties. I feel they would have offered sound career advice that I could have used. It took me so many trials to understand that what you are passionate about may not always be what you are skilled at doing. It’s funny how these dawns while you’re mid-way a presentation and you are lost in thoughts for 5 seconds before you could open your mouth.
(8) Lip-o-suction:
I need to write an ‘I'm sorry' card to my lips. I didn't realize that looking good had nothing to do with skillful kisser. Dunking my face into a tank with fish food plastered onto my face would have been more gratifying. I would have left intimacy for another time, for another guy. It was not peer pressure, but my inner being questioning my desirability.
When I do exit my twenties, I know for sure I would be happier to have realized my mistakes before it took further toll – I would like to look at some of the worst relationships as passing showers that only made me stronger. If you are nodding your head in agreement, here’s me raising my glass – er, okay, so my tumbler of Milo to you!

I’ve ended 8 instances that were my defining moments! What are your thoughts? Got someone in mind that you’d like to discuss this with? Go ahead and hit the ‘share’ button and compare notes!
As always, feel free to let me know your thoughts on Ms. Confidential on Facebook, Google+ or Twitter and look out for more reads on msconfidentialcolombo.blogspot.com!

[All images are courtesy of Google]

Comments

Read More Here

Relationship Advice from Sri Lankan Aunties

Of Unicorns, Disney Boyfriends, and Glass Slippers

Have fairly tales influenced our decisions? Are the happy endings we read about cause for our constant disappointment?

As I am 27, many many wonderful people take the liberty of reminding me that I am no longer in my ‘blossoming youth’ - I tell them often enough that if they approach these grounds without bodily provision, I will make parts of their anatomies blossom. I am just kidding, I do not say a word, I simply cower away with the most hackneyed excuse of all time ‘I am waiting for my Prince Charming’. To this, I always get the same answer saying that I watch too many sappy movies, read too many Mills & Boons (yes, in secret till I was 20) and watched too many Disney cartoons and I have UNREAL expectations. Can you believe the audacity these people possess?

When I think about this now, I think boys have been influenced by fairy tales far more than girls. Why? If you do think about it, their behaviour, perspectives, and assumptions are rooted in those magical books courtesy o…

Types of Sri Lankan Boyfriends

If you're a Sri Lankan girl under the age of 18, mentioning the ‘B' word will have your parents cartwheeling, calling the best witch doctor in Anuradhapura saying that you're possessed, because, after all, no Sri Lankan female under 30 was allowed to find love on her own accord.
For your Parents, every boy is trying to break open your treasure chest (if you know what I mean) – they are rabid pariahs, almost like anthrax. For every young girl educated in an all-female school until the budding age of 19, they’re lissome creatures, must-haves in every way.
It may not be very evident at first, but Sri Lankan Boyfriends are of several ‘genres’, if you may. Let’s take a look at some of the most obvious types!

1.) Moose:


This is the one who seems to have opinions of humanitarian, thoughts of a poet and a personality of a stone. Scrolling through his news feed, you will find so many interesting posts, quips, and comments, but IRL, he is just like Moose from Archie comics… ‘Duh… that&…

Ways Sri Lankan Girlfriends Drive you Nuts

Sri Lankan girlfriends are the ultimate ‘lunu dehi’ – they're hard to eat and need to be taken in smaller doses with a lot of other things to cut the acidity. The good kind is harder to get a hold of, but you know how amazing your plate of rice tastes with it. The same applies to Sri Lankan girlfriends. This week we pay homage to Sri Lankan girlfriends who seem to master the art of driving their boyfriends loco with carefully concocted ploys like the ones below.
1.)Menu Options Let’s start with my personal favourite. When he texts, “Babe, what do you want to eat?” when he is coming over or is grabbing a takeaway meal, the Sri Lankan girlfriends knows *exactly* what she wants. Whether it is Tipi Tip, Red Velvet Cake, or a 12-pack KFC Hot Drumlets, she knows, but she will wait until her SO tears his hair running out of options. Patiently waiting, tapping her nails, until he consults Yamu and Zomato for all the restaurants in town.
2.)Part Time Bouncer While on the subject of food, on a …

Does Size Matter?

My first question to a close friend after she declares she's just engaged in vigorous copulation is not 'How good was it?' or 'How long did it last?' - It’s ‘How BIG is it?’ I use my hands as means of measurement. Anything from elbow to wrist is a ‘unicorn’ – midway there and I smile my seal of approval. If I have to use my fingers, then it’s a different story altogether.

In strange way, there seems to be a positive correlation between the size of a man's penis and a woman’s satisfaction in bed. Think about it. Women, from the very beginning, have been 'gatherers', which ideally means they sow, reap and they secure provisions for their family. In a contemporary scenario, women are independent and we only expect men to provide the things and feels a dildo cannot. Women are financially independent, confident, career-minded individuals who buy their own Prada bags, drive a swanky number, and book their own vacation air tickets online. As gatherers who presi…